Your Ignorance is Bliss.

You know, there were times a many where I just felt like SCREAMING IN YOUR FACE the combination of three words that make it the highest level of difficulty a guy like myself can muster? But no, I couldn't. I wouldn't. I will not let my selfishness jeopardize this greatest friendship I have and will ever have. I do cherish it a lot. I don't want you to lose your trust in me. Its best that way..

I'm bleeding here
I'm screaming here
As my agony doesn't fade
A silent scream is made

What is trapped in these Chambers Four
Will remain, kept from all
Like rose stalks and knives they are
They pierce and rip apart the walls of scar
From the inside-out it bleeds
Out the Crimson within it leaks

I wish I could tell you
But no, it's better not to
For my fear you will leave
Its best to keep it beneath
For we might be happier together like This
As Your Ignorance is Bliss

My first ever poem.
Props goes to 'Jessica Fe'
gothictearsofblood.bravejournal.com
for the inspiration
I decided to write my own poem as I felt that what she wrote, reflects very clearly what I'm going through emotionally right now (three years ago(not so) and two years ago(very much) separately and of immediate period of writing). Why do I even write this in here? Well, honestly, nobody reads a nobody's blog. Mediocre blogs like this are meant for the publisher's own viewing pleasure and therefore they won't have to suffer social humiliation, which will lower their already-low self-esteems and/or confidents. I'm simply using this blog as a channel to empty that swelling bottle as there is no one else to hear me out. This blog is my channel of catharsis. My Only emotional(and many other) confidant shouldn't be hearing this, of course. I don't know why I feel so much for her. I've talked to her on MSN/phone much more than I've seen her face. Perhaps we share lots of common interests? And I was afraid that I'll feel so much for her cos I value our friendship more than anything I've ever owned. Yes, Everything put together. I DON'T want to love her, but I just can't help it! T~T Its agonising. There was then (two years ago) when I was confused whether was it Love or some bullshit infatuation. Though I know I'll never have her, as I'm not good enough for her and she obviously deserves better than the author here. I'm probably something embarrassing that she won't wanna go bring around and show off to her friends.. but anyway.. let me let out the stuff.. (thank you blogger.com for your invention, and prays she doesn't come across this as idk how to make this restricted(posting this post might be a big mistake). In the event she does, then I hope we can still be how we are/were. This is a confession, not a proposal(We don't believe in that, remember?). *Jumps off building and prays for the worst series of after-events that will kill me if it the previous doesn't leave me dead*)





*In her face*
I LOVE YOU-